Sunday, February 19, 2012

REPOST: Please Exorcise my 3-year-old


This is a repost from my old blog, 
but well worth posting again since nothing has changed!!!


I don't believe in the version of exorcism portrayed in horror movies, but after the past few nights of trying to put my three-year-old to bed, I am re-considring the validity of it. 

After the first few time of him getting out of bed, whining, "Mommy. I. Just. Can't. Sleeeeeeep," 
here are his list of abnormal behaviors:

Convulsions: 
 lying on his bed or on the ground, flopping like a fish out of water, and back arching and chest pumping like an alien is going to pop out of him.

Silent Staring:  
sitting "criss-cross applesauce" in his bed with glaring eyes, not saying a word. Just staring - usually with his arms crossed too. I am just waiting for him to start levitating.

Death Standing:  
opening the door so I go check on him (or go to yell at him) only to find him standing silently behind the door. Think children in the hotel hallway from "The Shining."

Uncontrollable Agitations: 
 when putting him back into bed, his kicking, hitting and head-butting. Head-spinning coming soon. I am lucky to have any teeth left.

Vomiting: 
 Okay, this one hasn't happened yet, but combine all of the behaviors above, 
and I think the movies may very well be onto something. 

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